(no subject)

[onemuseleft]

In case anyone's ever wondered, dealing with depression is a lot like having a second brain. Only it doesn't make you good at math or give you telepathy or make you awesome at multi-tasking. Mostly what it does is take over without you ever noticing until one day you're watching yourself do something, trapped in your own head and thinking don't do this, why are you doing this, this will just make you feel worse, you will fucking hate yourself if you do this and you can't make yourself not do it. It's being apathetic and self-loathing at the same time. It's the complete and utter lack of concern for anything.

And you don't realize any of this until you start to come out of it. Until the medication kicks in, or the chemicals balance or it just gradually passes on its own. And you wake up one morning and have no fucking clue who the hell you were the day before.