onemuseleft (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
onemuseleft) wrote2011-10-24 05:38 pm
onemuseleft) wrote2011-10-24 05:38 pm
Entry tags:
Fic: Sex Lies and Newsprint: Love Under Fire
Title: Sex Lies and Newsprint
Chapter: Chapter Two: Love Under Fire
Rating: PG for swearing and extremely mild sexual innuendo. No warnings apply.
Notes: Part Two of Sex, Lies and Newsprint but can be read as a stand-alone. Super fluffy and sappy.
Summary: No one approves of their love! Wait, what?
Previous chapters: Part One: Coming Out
Sex, Lies and Newsprint: A Year of Cap/Tony Romance As Told By the Tabloids
Part Two: Love Under Fire
Superhuman Star
Love Under Fire! Can Their Relationship Handle the Heat?
It's been barely a month since Steve Rogers and Tony Stark went public with their relationship but they're already facing opposition from all sides. The couple is having their own struggles adjusting to a new relationship, but our sources say it's the outside pressure – and outright condemnation – that are driving a wedge between them! Public opinion has been largely luke-warm to the announcement, though there has been a vocal opposition to Captain America – the living, breathing representation of American Values – being involved in an alternate lifestyle. And it hasn't been clear sailing for Iron Man, either.
"The board of directors is really unhappy about all of this," our insider, who asked not to be named, revealed. "Steve has a reputation for being really honest and forthright, and Tony's a businessman. The board's afraid that Steve's going to start pressuring Tony to change how he runs Stark Industries."
And those fears may not be completely unfounded. While Stark Industries does have a reputation for fair business practices, that reputation was very recently earned. In fact, Tony started cleaning up the family business right around the time he first became Iron Man - which is also right around the time he first met and became teammates with Steve Rogers. Could this be the golden influence of Captain America? And now that they're taking their relationship into the open, how much more of an influence will Steve have over America's third most powerful CEO?
But as if that weren't enough pressure on any new relationship, there's disapproval at home, too! Tony's long-time employee, friend and confidant, Edwin Jarvis, is reportedly very uncomfortable with the relationship, to the point that he's asked Tony not to mention it in his presence! And the Avengers, while trying to be supportive of the happiness of their two founding members, are apparently bracing for the inevitable fall-out.
"This sort of thing never ends well," our inside source explains. "That's why every military and business in the world has anti-fraternization rules. What happens when the relationship fails? What if they can't work together? The Avengers are responsible for saving the world. Are they really going to risk that for a romance that probably isn't going to make it?"
For no, the question remains: how much disapproval can their relationship take before they throw in the towel?
****
Tony walked out of the Board meeting feeling slightly shell-shocked. He hadn't felt this off-balance in a long time – possibly not without the assistance of painkillers, massive amounts of alcohol or emotional trauma. He wondered if this all counted as emotional trauma. "Did that just happen?"
"I think it did," Pepper said. She didn't sound nearly as traumatized, but she was watching Tony with slightly wide eyes instead of berating him for annoying the board members or ignoring him while she worked on her PDA, so possibly she was feeling the strangeness of the situation as well.
He thought about that for a minute, then asked the question that had been pressing on his mind for the last several hours. "Did the board of directors for Stark Industries just tell me to marry Captain America?"
Pepper nodded solemnly. "I think they did."
"That's weird," Tony said. "Did they seem, I don't know… happy with me in there?"
"They were happy with you," Pepper confirmed. "You might not have been able to recognize it because it happens so rarely."
"Hey," Tony objected for form's sake. "They were plenty happy with me after the StarkPhone II kicked Apple's ass."
"Yes," Pepper agreed, but she was smiling at him. "But what have you done for them lately?"
Tony chuckled. "Apparently I landed Captain America. Who knew that would be good for the stock prices?" It actually wasn't much of a surprise, when Tony really thought about it. Cap had a near-impeachable reputation, and with Wall Street in the mess it was, his relationship with Tony could conceivably be considered an endorsement of the company as well. It made Tony a little uncomfortable, especially since he didn't want to drag Cap's reputation down by association the next time he did something stupid, or someone used an old piece of SI weaponry to wreak havoc. "Why do I have the sneaking suspicion they'll be sending him swag?"
"He already wears SI shirts and publicly uses your tech," Pepper pointed out. "Frankly, short of tattooing your name across his forehead, he's a better representative than any of the celebrities we've hired over the years." She paused, then narrowed her eyes at him. "That just turned you on a little, didn't it?"
"Not his forehead," Tony said cheerfully, and Pepper smacked his arm.
****
Happy board members meant a significantly shorter board meeting than usual, which meant Tony made it home much earlier than he'd planned. He'd thought about staying at the office, but he'd been working a lot of long days lately, and since he'd cleared the entire day for the board meeting, it wasn't like there was anything else he was expected to be doing. So he told Pepper to take the rest of the day off – it was so cute the way she snorted derisively at him – and went back to Avengers HQ, intending to get a few productive hours in his workshop and maybe drag Steve out to dinner later.
The house was still and quiet when he got back, and he briefly wondered if there had been an Avengers call that he'd somehow missed – obviously due to the shock of being on the Board's good side, or at least that's what he would say when asked – but Peter was sprawled on a couch in the rec room, loose-limbed and relaxed, one leg hooked over the back of the couch, the hand with the remote handing over the edge, and looking half asleep as he watched an episode of Hoarders. "Hey," Tony said. "Where is everyone?"
"Bad guys seem to be taking the day off, so we figured we would, too," Peter said, not tearing his eyes away from the screen. "Luke and Jess went shopping for stuff for the nursery and Thor said something about ice giants. Everyone else went to lunch and I think the movies. Well, Clint and Natasha are in the gym, but I'd knock first if I were you."
Tony grinned. Hawkeye and Black Widow's sparring sessions were legendary. "I'll remember that." He loosened his tie and fought back a pang of disappointment. "So Steve's out, too?"
"Cap's in the kitchen with Jarvis." Peter said. "Apparently he's not a huge fan of Seth Rogen films, go figure."
"Imagine that," Tony said dryly. Steve's fascination with movies and television were well known among the Avengers but he was getting pickier the longer he was exposed.
"Quiet," Peter commanded. "You're making me miss my show. I want to know if Ron and Jennifer lose their kids."
Tony rolled his eyes and swatted at Peter's foot as he turned to leave the room. "Get your shoes off the couch."
"Yes, Dad," Peter said, without moving an inch.
He found Steve and Jarvis in the kitchen, getting dinner ready. Steve was standing in front of the stove, stirring something in a large pot and appeared to be adding salt to it. Tony felt his eyebrows try to crawl up his forehead, but Jarvis didn't even hit him with a wooden spoon. Jarvis wasn't as possessive of the kitchen as they all teased; after all, they all made their own snacks and fixed themselves meals when they didn't eat as a group. But when it came to sit-down meals, Jarvis considered that his job. Being allowed to contribute to the actual cooking process was reserved for a select few – of which Tony wasn't one. Actually, aside from Steve and Peter's Aunt May, no one in the Avengers would be able to get away with messing with Jarvis' cooking.
Tony leaned against the door and couldn't keep a stupid, goofy smile off his face as he watched Steve sample whatever he was cooking and add another shake of salt to it. He was pretty sure he'd never found someone cooking dinner to be a huge turn-on before – hell, he was almost certain he'd never dated anyone who could cook before – and it struck him as a fairly un-Tony Stark reaction. He could get used to it, though.
Jarvis smiled at him and reached over to nudge Steve, who looked up and greeted Tony with a smile that made Tony feel like he'd taken a head-on hit from an energy canon.
Steve was always doing that to him. Tony could get used to that, too. Christ, could he ever.
Steve put the lid back on the pot and came over to greet Tony. "You're early," he said, leaning in for a quick kiss. "Your board meetings usually take all day."
"They let me go early because I'm wonderful," Tony said. He smiled up at Steve and tugged on the curl of blond hair that fell over his forehead.
"You are wonderful," Steve agreed automatically. "Though they aren't usually perceptive enough to notice."
"Flatterer," Tony said. "I took the rest of the day off. I thought we could do something. Maybe basketball or a sparring match before dinner?"
"I promised Jarvis I'd help with the cooking." Steve leaned in for another quick kiss. "Do you want to stay and help?"
Tony grinned and leaned around Steve to look pointedly at Jarvis. "I'm not allowed to help in the kitchen. I've been shunned."
"Tony," Steve said.
"You may stay," Jarvis said benevolently. "So long as you touch nothing. Captain, please, you would be doing me a far greater favor by ensuring Mr. Stark does not meddle with anything until dinner is ready." Jarvis wiped his hands on a dish towel and gave Tony a pointed look. "Anything."
"Man, empty one pepper shaker into one soufflé when you're nine years old and no one ever lets you forget about it."
Steve gave him a sideways grin. "You didn't."
"He did," Jarvis confirmed. He checked the pot Steve had been taste-testing and turned the heat down a bit. "I do believe he was trying to help, but heavens, that soufflé was a disaster. And it still pales in comparison to the macaroni and cheese incident."
"Oh," Steve said, aiming a wide grin at Tony. "I need to hear about that."
"I think you don't," Tony said. He hooked his fingers through the belt loop of Steve's jeans and tried to tug him out of the kitchen.
"I'll tell you all about it one day," Jarvis promised. "We'll talk while Mr. Stark is at his next board meeting. I dare say they'll have stopped finding him wonderful by then."
"Traitor," Tony accused without heat as he tugged at Steve's jeans again.
"Tony," Steve rebuked him mildly, refusing to be budged. "I bet you were cute as a kid."
"Kid?" Jarvis said. "Captain, you do misunderstand. The macaroni and cheese incident happened – well, it can't have been more than a few months before the Avengers were founded. There is a reason Mr. Stark keeps a full kitchen staff, after all."
Tony felt his face grow warm as Steve laughed. "It wasn't – look, there were extenuating circumstance. Which you will never hear about, ever, because Jarvis, you're fired."
"Ms. Potts also knows the story," Jarvis told Steve.
"Pepper is also fired," Tony said. "Steve, you don't want Jarvis and Pepper losing their jobs on your conscience, do you?"
"I'm pretty sure that's all on you," Steve said. He caught Tony's hand by the wrist and tugged until Tony let go of his jeans. "Really, Tony. Did you threaten to fire Jarvis every time he told someone a story about you as a kid. Or, well, a slightly younger man?"
Tony blinked up at him, caught a little by surprise. "I don't – I haven't really had a lot of people Jarvis could tell stories too. I mean, Rhodey," he said, "but he was there for all the really good ones anyway."
"Most of which I have remained blissfully ignorant of," Jarvis said. "Though I did overhear a description of something Colonel Rhodes called 'the unfortunate hooker debacle of two thousand and two'."
"I probably don't want to know, do I?" Steve asked, but he looked kind of curious to Tony's eyes and he was smiling as he said it.
"It's not nearly as interesting as it sounds. And it wasn't actually that unfortunate. And it turned out she wasn't really a hooker." Tony frowned. "We also agreed never to bring it up again. Who was he telling that story to that you would have heard it? Oh, god, tell me it wasn't Clint."
"I really should start setting the table," Jarvis said and Steve laughed as Tony squawked indignantly.
"You can help me make the salad," Steve suggested. "And by help, I mean watch."
Tony let himself be tugged further into the kitchen, shooting Jarvis a grin as he did and blushing a little at the indulgent smile Jarvis gave him in return. "He likes you, you know," he said as Jarvis disappeared into the dining room.
"I like Jarvis," Steve said automatically, gathering an armful of vegetables out of the fridge. "He's a good man. And he takes care of you." His tone implied that Tony needed a lot of that and Jarvis might be fighting a losing battle.
"He never-" Tony bit his lip and stopped himself for a moment, considering his words. Part of him was hesitating to mention anything, but he was aware enough of his own weaknesses to know that it wasn't a lack of faith in Steve that made him hesitate. Steve gave him a glance, but didn't stop chopping lettuce, content to let Tony finish or not on his own time. "He's never told anyone else those stories. Or even threatened to. And – you've met some of my exes, Steve, I'm not good at – I haven't had a lot of people in my life that were trustworthy enough to give them anything like ammunition to use against me. Even stupid kid stories. Let alone the mac n'cheese thing and he'd have killed himself before he brought up the hooker debacle and crap, that reminds me, I have to kill Rhodey."
Steve set the knife down and caught Tony's hand in his, twined their fingers together. "Thank you for telling me that. It means a lot to me." He brought their hands to his lips, kissed Tony's fingers. "You know I respect you, Tony. You really are wonderful."
Emotion curled deep in Tony's chest, painful almost, piercing, and he had to take a deep breath before he stepped closer and put his arms around Steve's waist. He closed his eyes as Steve's arms wrapped around him. "You're pretty wonderful yourself," he said finally.
Steve pressed a kiss against Tony's temple, then his cheekbone, then his mouth. Tender and sweet and Steve and Tony thought maybe every bad decision he'd ever made could be forgiven because it ended up with him here, in the kitchen of his home, surrounded by the smell of a home-cooked meal with the man he'd always loved more than anything, anyone else holding him. The kiss lingered, deepened until arousal uncurled low in his belly and Tony wanted to laugh at himself. All the crazy, stupid things he'd done in the name of love over the years and this is what pushed his buttons now. Kissing in the kitchen. God, Steve was going to domesticate him.
"Oh god, my eyes," Peter moaned from the doorway behind them. "Guys, get a room."
Tony laughed into the kiss as Steve rolled his eyes toward the ceiling and sighed.
"You should be glad your parents still kiss," Tony said not loosening his grip on Steve. "All your friends' parents are divorced and bitter."
Peter rolled his eyes. "When's dinner ready, Mom?"
"You know," Tony said, "You should have told me before we started dating that you had a kid."
That earned him a snort. "Wait till you meet his brothers and sisters," Steve said. "He's got them all doing it now. Except Logan, who just keeps calling me Mrs. Stark."
Some of his amusement must have shown on his face because Steve rolled his eyes and pulled back. "Yes, yes, Tony. You don't want to know what he's calling you."
Tony ran a few names through his head and decided it probably wasn't anything he couldn't live down. Frankly, he'd almost certainly been called worse. And it would be worth it just to hear Logan call Steve "Mrs Stark" even once. Tony wasn't going to think about how his stomach had gotten all tied up when Steve said that. "So if they're all our kids now, does that make Jan and Hank's relationship incestuous?"
"Don't encourage them," Steve said, grabbing Peter's hand as he tried to help himself to a handful of chopped carrots. "We're supposed to be setting an example."
Peter snorted.
"Sure," Tony said. "Because we're their parents."
"Because we're their team leaders." Steve gave Tony an exasperated look as he steered Peter toward the dining room. "Tony, you're not taking this seriously at all, are you?"
"If we're their parents, that means we get to ground them," Tony said. "I'd ground Peter, but he doesn't really have a social life, so I'll have to take away his TV rights instead."
"I have a girlfriend!" Peter shouted through the open doorway. "Just because you've never met her doesn't mean she isn't real!"
"Uh-huh," Tony said. "Sure you do. And she's a super-model, right?"
"I hate you both," Peter sulked from the dining room. "Stop making out in the kitchen and finish dinner. Some of us need more than mutual admiration to live on, you know."
"We do?" Natasha's voice drifted through from the other room. "Who admires who? I could live off mutual admiration, if there was a lot of sex mixed in. And chocolate. And the occasional glass of wine. Dinner smells fantastic, Jarvis."
"Steve and Tony are making out instead of finishing dinner," Peter informed the others and Natasha stuck her head through the doorway to flash Tony a thumbs-up.
The front door burst open and a babble of voices exploded into the mansion as the others returned from their movie. Tony heard Jan and Tigra were exclaiming over something while Luke and Nova bickered back and forth and the Jesses spoke in a soft, pleasant murmur. Ororo's bell-like laughter filled the whole house as Thor's heavy footsteps tromped down the hall.
And Tony, ridiculously, felt like he was the one coming home.
Steve sighed and leaned down to kiss Tony one last time before pushing him toward the dining room as well. "I'll finish in here. Go make sure the children behave," he said ruefully.
Tony eyed the doorway warily. "I don't think I got the better end of this deal."
Tigra bounced into the kitchen, nearly running into Tony who reached out to settle her and ended up enveloped in a bear hug. "Mom and Dad! What's for dinner?"
"Bread and water," Steve told her.
Thor strode in after her, a vicious-looking cut down one side of his face, his jaw dark purple from a bruise that would have killed a mortal, a wicked grin on his face. Tony'd have been worried if that wasn't how Thor usually looked after coming back from fighting frost giants. He seemed to like getting hit by something that was as strong as he was. "Brothers, you missed a glorious fight. The foul beasts were in fine form today."
"I had to battle share-holders," Tony told him and Thor actually shook his head and winced in sympathy. Tony loved the guy, he seriously did.
"Out of the way, Ward." Logan shouldered his way into the room, pushing Tony and Tigra aside as he made a beeline for the fridge.
Ward? Tony mouthed at Steve over Tigra's shoulder and Steve crossed his arms and gave him a pointed look. He wasn't Ward Cleaver. Okay, he had the suit and tie, but really. "You're way hotter than June Cleaver," he told Steve, perhaps a little too earnestly because Tigra giggled and began bouncing up and down in his arms and thank god she was way too young for him because that could get distracting. "Does that make Peter the Beaver? Who's Wally?"
"Clint is totally Wally," Jessica Drew said from the doorway while Clint sputtered objections somewhere behind her. "Jarvis wants to know what happened to his salad."
"I didn't like Leave it to Beaver," Steve said as he handed the finished salad to Thor.
"We're more like The Incredibles anyway," Tigra said. "Dysfunctional, but still awesome and willing to mess up anyone who messes with us."
Tony gave her a grin. "You nailed it, kid."
"We're not dysfunctional," Steve objected.
Tony raised a skeptical eyebrow as he scanned the room. Logan had already thrown back one beer and was working on a second, the rest of the six-pack dangling from one hand as he stomped back toward the dining room. Thor, who had apparently spent the day getting kicked around by giants and loving it and was now trying to put more dressing on the salad without Steve noticing. Tigra who was preparing to trip Logan with her tail, which would undoubtedly start a fight and end with beer everywhere and the two of them chasing each other around the mansion while their dinners got cold. And that wasn't counting the lunatics in the other room, where Luke and Nova had sucked Clint into their argument and Peter was loudly telling anyone who would listen that he was way cooler than the Beav.
"We're kind of messed up," he told Steve as Tigra lashed out with her tail and Logan went stumbling.
Steve leaned back against the counter and shook his head as the two of them took off into the next room and the noisy clamor of dinner preparations turned into chaos. "Think it's too late for family therapy?"
"Oh yeah," Tony said. "Way too late."
Steve smiled at him, a flash of bright white teeth and laughing eyes that made Tony suck in air. "At least we can be messed up together."
He was probably talking about the team, but Tony didn't care. "We're lucky like that."
Steve reached out and snagged Tony by the sleeve, tugging until he came close enough for Steve to wrap his arms around him. "We are. I am. I wondered, a lot, in the early days if I'd ever manage to belong somewhere again." He rested his head on Tony's shoulder, his breath warm against Tony's ear. "That was before I got to know you."
His stomach clenched, his legs felt numb, and when he wrapped his arms around Steve it might have been partly for balance. "I love you," Tony said, something he hadn't meant to say so soon in the relationship, but he didn't care. A confession like that deserved to be returned.
Steve smiled against the shell of his ear. "I know. I love you, too." He rocked Tony slightly, swaying to the sounds of destruction coming from the next room. "After dinner, we should do something together."
"Basketball?" Tony offered, wincing a little at a particularly loud crash and the sound of Jarvis' raised voice. "Or a movie. Have you ever actually seen The Incredibles?"
"You should invite Rhodey to movie night," Steve said. "I can get the hooker debacle out of him and you won't have to go looking far to kill him."
"I really, really love you," Tony said, "even if you did hide your thirteen crazy kids from me."
"Eleven," Steve said. "I take no responsibility for Thor or Peter."
That was fair.
Jarvis called from the next room. "Captain, Mr. Stark, the children are settled. It is quite safe to come in."
"Best babysitter ever," Tony said. He pressed a kiss against Steve's throat as he stepped away and hefted the stew pot off the stove.
"You should rehire him," Steve said. Another sudden crash from the dining room made them both wince. "And maybe give him a raise. A big one."
"I vote we just give him Peter," Tony said.
Chapter: Chapter Two: Love Under Fire
Rating: PG for swearing and extremely mild sexual innuendo. No warnings apply.
Notes: Part Two of Sex, Lies and Newsprint but can be read as a stand-alone. Super fluffy and sappy.
Summary: No one approves of their love! Wait, what?
Previous chapters: Part One: Coming Out
Sex, Lies and Newsprint: A Year of Cap/Tony Romance As Told By the Tabloids
Part Two: Love Under Fire
Superhuman Star
Love Under Fire! Can Their Relationship Handle the Heat?
It's been barely a month since Steve Rogers and Tony Stark went public with their relationship but they're already facing opposition from all sides. The couple is having their own struggles adjusting to a new relationship, but our sources say it's the outside pressure – and outright condemnation – that are driving a wedge between them! Public opinion has been largely luke-warm to the announcement, though there has been a vocal opposition to Captain America – the living, breathing representation of American Values – being involved in an alternate lifestyle. And it hasn't been clear sailing for Iron Man, either.
"The board of directors is really unhappy about all of this," our insider, who asked not to be named, revealed. "Steve has a reputation for being really honest and forthright, and Tony's a businessman. The board's afraid that Steve's going to start pressuring Tony to change how he runs Stark Industries."
And those fears may not be completely unfounded. While Stark Industries does have a reputation for fair business practices, that reputation was very recently earned. In fact, Tony started cleaning up the family business right around the time he first became Iron Man - which is also right around the time he first met and became teammates with Steve Rogers. Could this be the golden influence of Captain America? And now that they're taking their relationship into the open, how much more of an influence will Steve have over America's third most powerful CEO?
But as if that weren't enough pressure on any new relationship, there's disapproval at home, too! Tony's long-time employee, friend and confidant, Edwin Jarvis, is reportedly very uncomfortable with the relationship, to the point that he's asked Tony not to mention it in his presence! And the Avengers, while trying to be supportive of the happiness of their two founding members, are apparently bracing for the inevitable fall-out.
"This sort of thing never ends well," our inside source explains. "That's why every military and business in the world has anti-fraternization rules. What happens when the relationship fails? What if they can't work together? The Avengers are responsible for saving the world. Are they really going to risk that for a romance that probably isn't going to make it?"
For no, the question remains: how much disapproval can their relationship take before they throw in the towel?
****
Tony walked out of the Board meeting feeling slightly shell-shocked. He hadn't felt this off-balance in a long time – possibly not without the assistance of painkillers, massive amounts of alcohol or emotional trauma. He wondered if this all counted as emotional trauma. "Did that just happen?"
"I think it did," Pepper said. She didn't sound nearly as traumatized, but she was watching Tony with slightly wide eyes instead of berating him for annoying the board members or ignoring him while she worked on her PDA, so possibly she was feeling the strangeness of the situation as well.
He thought about that for a minute, then asked the question that had been pressing on his mind for the last several hours. "Did the board of directors for Stark Industries just tell me to marry Captain America?"
Pepper nodded solemnly. "I think they did."
"That's weird," Tony said. "Did they seem, I don't know… happy with me in there?"
"They were happy with you," Pepper confirmed. "You might not have been able to recognize it because it happens so rarely."
"Hey," Tony objected for form's sake. "They were plenty happy with me after the StarkPhone II kicked Apple's ass."
"Yes," Pepper agreed, but she was smiling at him. "But what have you done for them lately?"
Tony chuckled. "Apparently I landed Captain America. Who knew that would be good for the stock prices?" It actually wasn't much of a surprise, when Tony really thought about it. Cap had a near-impeachable reputation, and with Wall Street in the mess it was, his relationship with Tony could conceivably be considered an endorsement of the company as well. It made Tony a little uncomfortable, especially since he didn't want to drag Cap's reputation down by association the next time he did something stupid, or someone used an old piece of SI weaponry to wreak havoc. "Why do I have the sneaking suspicion they'll be sending him swag?"
"He already wears SI shirts and publicly uses your tech," Pepper pointed out. "Frankly, short of tattooing your name across his forehead, he's a better representative than any of the celebrities we've hired over the years." She paused, then narrowed her eyes at him. "That just turned you on a little, didn't it?"
"Not his forehead," Tony said cheerfully, and Pepper smacked his arm.
****
Happy board members meant a significantly shorter board meeting than usual, which meant Tony made it home much earlier than he'd planned. He'd thought about staying at the office, but he'd been working a lot of long days lately, and since he'd cleared the entire day for the board meeting, it wasn't like there was anything else he was expected to be doing. So he told Pepper to take the rest of the day off – it was so cute the way she snorted derisively at him – and went back to Avengers HQ, intending to get a few productive hours in his workshop and maybe drag Steve out to dinner later.
The house was still and quiet when he got back, and he briefly wondered if there had been an Avengers call that he'd somehow missed – obviously due to the shock of being on the Board's good side, or at least that's what he would say when asked – but Peter was sprawled on a couch in the rec room, loose-limbed and relaxed, one leg hooked over the back of the couch, the hand with the remote handing over the edge, and looking half asleep as he watched an episode of Hoarders. "Hey," Tony said. "Where is everyone?"
"Bad guys seem to be taking the day off, so we figured we would, too," Peter said, not tearing his eyes away from the screen. "Luke and Jess went shopping for stuff for the nursery and Thor said something about ice giants. Everyone else went to lunch and I think the movies. Well, Clint and Natasha are in the gym, but I'd knock first if I were you."
Tony grinned. Hawkeye and Black Widow's sparring sessions were legendary. "I'll remember that." He loosened his tie and fought back a pang of disappointment. "So Steve's out, too?"
"Cap's in the kitchen with Jarvis." Peter said. "Apparently he's not a huge fan of Seth Rogen films, go figure."
"Imagine that," Tony said dryly. Steve's fascination with movies and television were well known among the Avengers but he was getting pickier the longer he was exposed.
"Quiet," Peter commanded. "You're making me miss my show. I want to know if Ron and Jennifer lose their kids."
Tony rolled his eyes and swatted at Peter's foot as he turned to leave the room. "Get your shoes off the couch."
"Yes, Dad," Peter said, without moving an inch.
He found Steve and Jarvis in the kitchen, getting dinner ready. Steve was standing in front of the stove, stirring something in a large pot and appeared to be adding salt to it. Tony felt his eyebrows try to crawl up his forehead, but Jarvis didn't even hit him with a wooden spoon. Jarvis wasn't as possessive of the kitchen as they all teased; after all, they all made their own snacks and fixed themselves meals when they didn't eat as a group. But when it came to sit-down meals, Jarvis considered that his job. Being allowed to contribute to the actual cooking process was reserved for a select few – of which Tony wasn't one. Actually, aside from Steve and Peter's Aunt May, no one in the Avengers would be able to get away with messing with Jarvis' cooking.
Tony leaned against the door and couldn't keep a stupid, goofy smile off his face as he watched Steve sample whatever he was cooking and add another shake of salt to it. He was pretty sure he'd never found someone cooking dinner to be a huge turn-on before – hell, he was almost certain he'd never dated anyone who could cook before – and it struck him as a fairly un-Tony Stark reaction. He could get used to it, though.
Jarvis smiled at him and reached over to nudge Steve, who looked up and greeted Tony with a smile that made Tony feel like he'd taken a head-on hit from an energy canon.
Steve was always doing that to him. Tony could get used to that, too. Christ, could he ever.
Steve put the lid back on the pot and came over to greet Tony. "You're early," he said, leaning in for a quick kiss. "Your board meetings usually take all day."
"They let me go early because I'm wonderful," Tony said. He smiled up at Steve and tugged on the curl of blond hair that fell over his forehead.
"You are wonderful," Steve agreed automatically. "Though they aren't usually perceptive enough to notice."
"Flatterer," Tony said. "I took the rest of the day off. I thought we could do something. Maybe basketball or a sparring match before dinner?"
"I promised Jarvis I'd help with the cooking." Steve leaned in for another quick kiss. "Do you want to stay and help?"
Tony grinned and leaned around Steve to look pointedly at Jarvis. "I'm not allowed to help in the kitchen. I've been shunned."
"Tony," Steve said.
"You may stay," Jarvis said benevolently. "So long as you touch nothing. Captain, please, you would be doing me a far greater favor by ensuring Mr. Stark does not meddle with anything until dinner is ready." Jarvis wiped his hands on a dish towel and gave Tony a pointed look. "Anything."
"Man, empty one pepper shaker into one soufflé when you're nine years old and no one ever lets you forget about it."
Steve gave him a sideways grin. "You didn't."
"He did," Jarvis confirmed. He checked the pot Steve had been taste-testing and turned the heat down a bit. "I do believe he was trying to help, but heavens, that soufflé was a disaster. And it still pales in comparison to the macaroni and cheese incident."
"Oh," Steve said, aiming a wide grin at Tony. "I need to hear about that."
"I think you don't," Tony said. He hooked his fingers through the belt loop of Steve's jeans and tried to tug him out of the kitchen.
"I'll tell you all about it one day," Jarvis promised. "We'll talk while Mr. Stark is at his next board meeting. I dare say they'll have stopped finding him wonderful by then."
"Traitor," Tony accused without heat as he tugged at Steve's jeans again.
"Tony," Steve rebuked him mildly, refusing to be budged. "I bet you were cute as a kid."
"Kid?" Jarvis said. "Captain, you do misunderstand. The macaroni and cheese incident happened – well, it can't have been more than a few months before the Avengers were founded. There is a reason Mr. Stark keeps a full kitchen staff, after all."
Tony felt his face grow warm as Steve laughed. "It wasn't – look, there were extenuating circumstance. Which you will never hear about, ever, because Jarvis, you're fired."
"Ms. Potts also knows the story," Jarvis told Steve.
"Pepper is also fired," Tony said. "Steve, you don't want Jarvis and Pepper losing their jobs on your conscience, do you?"
"I'm pretty sure that's all on you," Steve said. He caught Tony's hand by the wrist and tugged until Tony let go of his jeans. "Really, Tony. Did you threaten to fire Jarvis every time he told someone a story about you as a kid. Or, well, a slightly younger man?"
Tony blinked up at him, caught a little by surprise. "I don't – I haven't really had a lot of people Jarvis could tell stories too. I mean, Rhodey," he said, "but he was there for all the really good ones anyway."
"Most of which I have remained blissfully ignorant of," Jarvis said. "Though I did overhear a description of something Colonel Rhodes called 'the unfortunate hooker debacle of two thousand and two'."
"I probably don't want to know, do I?" Steve asked, but he looked kind of curious to Tony's eyes and he was smiling as he said it.
"It's not nearly as interesting as it sounds. And it wasn't actually that unfortunate. And it turned out she wasn't really a hooker." Tony frowned. "We also agreed never to bring it up again. Who was he telling that story to that you would have heard it? Oh, god, tell me it wasn't Clint."
"I really should start setting the table," Jarvis said and Steve laughed as Tony squawked indignantly.
"You can help me make the salad," Steve suggested. "And by help, I mean watch."
Tony let himself be tugged further into the kitchen, shooting Jarvis a grin as he did and blushing a little at the indulgent smile Jarvis gave him in return. "He likes you, you know," he said as Jarvis disappeared into the dining room.
"I like Jarvis," Steve said automatically, gathering an armful of vegetables out of the fridge. "He's a good man. And he takes care of you." His tone implied that Tony needed a lot of that and Jarvis might be fighting a losing battle.
"He never-" Tony bit his lip and stopped himself for a moment, considering his words. Part of him was hesitating to mention anything, but he was aware enough of his own weaknesses to know that it wasn't a lack of faith in Steve that made him hesitate. Steve gave him a glance, but didn't stop chopping lettuce, content to let Tony finish or not on his own time. "He's never told anyone else those stories. Or even threatened to. And – you've met some of my exes, Steve, I'm not good at – I haven't had a lot of people in my life that were trustworthy enough to give them anything like ammunition to use against me. Even stupid kid stories. Let alone the mac n'cheese thing and he'd have killed himself before he brought up the hooker debacle and crap, that reminds me, I have to kill Rhodey."
Steve set the knife down and caught Tony's hand in his, twined their fingers together. "Thank you for telling me that. It means a lot to me." He brought their hands to his lips, kissed Tony's fingers. "You know I respect you, Tony. You really are wonderful."
Emotion curled deep in Tony's chest, painful almost, piercing, and he had to take a deep breath before he stepped closer and put his arms around Steve's waist. He closed his eyes as Steve's arms wrapped around him. "You're pretty wonderful yourself," he said finally.
Steve pressed a kiss against Tony's temple, then his cheekbone, then his mouth. Tender and sweet and Steve and Tony thought maybe every bad decision he'd ever made could be forgiven because it ended up with him here, in the kitchen of his home, surrounded by the smell of a home-cooked meal with the man he'd always loved more than anything, anyone else holding him. The kiss lingered, deepened until arousal uncurled low in his belly and Tony wanted to laugh at himself. All the crazy, stupid things he'd done in the name of love over the years and this is what pushed his buttons now. Kissing in the kitchen. God, Steve was going to domesticate him.
"Oh god, my eyes," Peter moaned from the doorway behind them. "Guys, get a room."
Tony laughed into the kiss as Steve rolled his eyes toward the ceiling and sighed.
"You should be glad your parents still kiss," Tony said not loosening his grip on Steve. "All your friends' parents are divorced and bitter."
Peter rolled his eyes. "When's dinner ready, Mom?"
"You know," Tony said, "You should have told me before we started dating that you had a kid."
That earned him a snort. "Wait till you meet his brothers and sisters," Steve said. "He's got them all doing it now. Except Logan, who just keeps calling me Mrs. Stark."
Some of his amusement must have shown on his face because Steve rolled his eyes and pulled back. "Yes, yes, Tony. You don't want to know what he's calling you."
Tony ran a few names through his head and decided it probably wasn't anything he couldn't live down. Frankly, he'd almost certainly been called worse. And it would be worth it just to hear Logan call Steve "Mrs Stark" even once. Tony wasn't going to think about how his stomach had gotten all tied up when Steve said that. "So if they're all our kids now, does that make Jan and Hank's relationship incestuous?"
"Don't encourage them," Steve said, grabbing Peter's hand as he tried to help himself to a handful of chopped carrots. "We're supposed to be setting an example."
Peter snorted.
"Sure," Tony said. "Because we're their parents."
"Because we're their team leaders." Steve gave Tony an exasperated look as he steered Peter toward the dining room. "Tony, you're not taking this seriously at all, are you?"
"If we're their parents, that means we get to ground them," Tony said. "I'd ground Peter, but he doesn't really have a social life, so I'll have to take away his TV rights instead."
"I have a girlfriend!" Peter shouted through the open doorway. "Just because you've never met her doesn't mean she isn't real!"
"Uh-huh," Tony said. "Sure you do. And she's a super-model, right?"
"I hate you both," Peter sulked from the dining room. "Stop making out in the kitchen and finish dinner. Some of us need more than mutual admiration to live on, you know."
"We do?" Natasha's voice drifted through from the other room. "Who admires who? I could live off mutual admiration, if there was a lot of sex mixed in. And chocolate. And the occasional glass of wine. Dinner smells fantastic, Jarvis."
"Steve and Tony are making out instead of finishing dinner," Peter informed the others and Natasha stuck her head through the doorway to flash Tony a thumbs-up.
The front door burst open and a babble of voices exploded into the mansion as the others returned from their movie. Tony heard Jan and Tigra were exclaiming over something while Luke and Nova bickered back and forth and the Jesses spoke in a soft, pleasant murmur. Ororo's bell-like laughter filled the whole house as Thor's heavy footsteps tromped down the hall.
And Tony, ridiculously, felt like he was the one coming home.
Steve sighed and leaned down to kiss Tony one last time before pushing him toward the dining room as well. "I'll finish in here. Go make sure the children behave," he said ruefully.
Tony eyed the doorway warily. "I don't think I got the better end of this deal."
Tigra bounced into the kitchen, nearly running into Tony who reached out to settle her and ended up enveloped in a bear hug. "Mom and Dad! What's for dinner?"
"Bread and water," Steve told her.
Thor strode in after her, a vicious-looking cut down one side of his face, his jaw dark purple from a bruise that would have killed a mortal, a wicked grin on his face. Tony'd have been worried if that wasn't how Thor usually looked after coming back from fighting frost giants. He seemed to like getting hit by something that was as strong as he was. "Brothers, you missed a glorious fight. The foul beasts were in fine form today."
"I had to battle share-holders," Tony told him and Thor actually shook his head and winced in sympathy. Tony loved the guy, he seriously did.
"Out of the way, Ward." Logan shouldered his way into the room, pushing Tony and Tigra aside as he made a beeline for the fridge.
Ward? Tony mouthed at Steve over Tigra's shoulder and Steve crossed his arms and gave him a pointed look. He wasn't Ward Cleaver. Okay, he had the suit and tie, but really. "You're way hotter than June Cleaver," he told Steve, perhaps a little too earnestly because Tigra giggled and began bouncing up and down in his arms and thank god she was way too young for him because that could get distracting. "Does that make Peter the Beaver? Who's Wally?"
"Clint is totally Wally," Jessica Drew said from the doorway while Clint sputtered objections somewhere behind her. "Jarvis wants to know what happened to his salad."
"I didn't like Leave it to Beaver," Steve said as he handed the finished salad to Thor.
"We're more like The Incredibles anyway," Tigra said. "Dysfunctional, but still awesome and willing to mess up anyone who messes with us."
Tony gave her a grin. "You nailed it, kid."
"We're not dysfunctional," Steve objected.
Tony raised a skeptical eyebrow as he scanned the room. Logan had already thrown back one beer and was working on a second, the rest of the six-pack dangling from one hand as he stomped back toward the dining room. Thor, who had apparently spent the day getting kicked around by giants and loving it and was now trying to put more dressing on the salad without Steve noticing. Tigra who was preparing to trip Logan with her tail, which would undoubtedly start a fight and end with beer everywhere and the two of them chasing each other around the mansion while their dinners got cold. And that wasn't counting the lunatics in the other room, where Luke and Nova had sucked Clint into their argument and Peter was loudly telling anyone who would listen that he was way cooler than the Beav.
"We're kind of messed up," he told Steve as Tigra lashed out with her tail and Logan went stumbling.
Steve leaned back against the counter and shook his head as the two of them took off into the next room and the noisy clamor of dinner preparations turned into chaos. "Think it's too late for family therapy?"
"Oh yeah," Tony said. "Way too late."
Steve smiled at him, a flash of bright white teeth and laughing eyes that made Tony suck in air. "At least we can be messed up together."
He was probably talking about the team, but Tony didn't care. "We're lucky like that."
Steve reached out and snagged Tony by the sleeve, tugging until he came close enough for Steve to wrap his arms around him. "We are. I am. I wondered, a lot, in the early days if I'd ever manage to belong somewhere again." He rested his head on Tony's shoulder, his breath warm against Tony's ear. "That was before I got to know you."
His stomach clenched, his legs felt numb, and when he wrapped his arms around Steve it might have been partly for balance. "I love you," Tony said, something he hadn't meant to say so soon in the relationship, but he didn't care. A confession like that deserved to be returned.
Steve smiled against the shell of his ear. "I know. I love you, too." He rocked Tony slightly, swaying to the sounds of destruction coming from the next room. "After dinner, we should do something together."
"Basketball?" Tony offered, wincing a little at a particularly loud crash and the sound of Jarvis' raised voice. "Or a movie. Have you ever actually seen The Incredibles?"
"You should invite Rhodey to movie night," Steve said. "I can get the hooker debacle out of him and you won't have to go looking far to kill him."
"I really, really love you," Tony said, "even if you did hide your thirteen crazy kids from me."
"Eleven," Steve said. "I take no responsibility for Thor or Peter."
That was fair.
Jarvis called from the next room. "Captain, Mr. Stark, the children are settled. It is quite safe to come in."
"Best babysitter ever," Tony said. He pressed a kiss against Steve's throat as he stepped away and hefted the stew pot off the stove.
"You should rehire him," Steve said. Another sudden crash from the dining room made them both wince. "And maybe give him a raise. A big one."
"I vote we just give him Peter," Tony said.